Healing after Pet Loss
(reprinted by permission of www.goodgrief.com)

  - Give yourself permission to grieve - only you know what your pet meant to you.
  - Memorialize your pet.
  - Get lots of rest, good nutrition and exercise.
  - Surround yourself with people who understand your loss.
  - Learn all you can about the grief process.
  - Accept the feelings that come with grief.
  - Indulge yourself in small pleasures.
  - Be patient with yourself; don’t let society dictate how long mourning should last.
  - Give yourself permission to backslide.
  - Don’t be afraid to get help.
The death of a pet means the loss of a non-judgmental love source. Psychologists have long recognized that the grief suffered by pet owners after their pet dies is the same as that experienced after the death of a person. Given time, healing will occur for the bereaved owner.

Eulogy to a Dog
by George Graham Vest, 1830-1904

The following tribute was delivered by George Graham Vest, an attorney for Charles Burden, who sued his neighbor for shooting Burden’s beloved hunting dog Drum in 1870.

     “The best friend a man has in the world may turn against him and become his enemy. His son or daughter that he has reared with loving care may prove ungrateful. Those who are nearest and dearest to us, those whom we trust with our happiness and our good name, may become traitors to their faith.
     “The money a man has he may lose. It flies away from him when he needs it most. A man’s reputation may be sacrificed in a moment of ill-considered action.
     “The people who are prone to fall on their knees to do us honor when success is with us may be the first to throw stones of malice when failure settles its clouds upon our heads.
     “The one absolutely unselfish friend that a man can have in this selfish world, the one that never deserts him, the one that never proves ungrateful or treacherous, is his dog.
     “A man’s dog stands by him in prosperity and in poverty, in health and sickness. He will sleep on the cold ground where the wintry winds blow and the snow drives fiercely, if only he may be near his master’s side.
     “He will kiss the hand that has no food to offer. He will lick the sores and wounds that come in encounter with the roughness of the world.
     “He guards the sleep of his pauper master as if he were the prince. When all other friends desert, he remains. When riches take wings and reputation falls to pieces, he is as constant in his love as the sun in its journey through the heavens.
     “If misfortune drives the master forth an outcast in the world, friendless and homeless, the faithful dog asks no higher privilege than that of accompanying him to guard against danger, to fight against his enemies.
     “And when the last scene of all comes, and death takes the master in its embrace and his body is laid away in the cold ground, no matter if all other friends pursue their way, there by the graveside will the noble dog be found, his head between his paws, his eyes sad but open in alert watchfulness, faithful and true, even in death.”

Needless to say, Mr. Burden won his case; in fact, it is said that the defense attorney whispered to one of his assistants, ”We had better get out of the courtroom with our client or we might all be hanged.”

The House Dog’s Grave
(Haig, an English bulldog)
by Robinson Jeffers, Copyright Jeffers Literary Properties

I’ve changed my ways a little; I cannot now
Run with you in the evenings along the shore,
Except in a kind of dream; and you, if you dream a moment,
You see me there.

So leave awhile the paw-marks on the front door
Where I used to scratch to go out or in,
And you’d soon open; leave on the kitchen floor
The marks of my drinking-pan.

I cannot lie by your fire as I used to do
On the warm stone,
Nor at the foot of your bed; no, all the nights through
I lie alone.

But your kind thought has laid me less than six feet
Outside your window where firelight so often plays,
And where you sit to read - and I fear often grieving for me -
Every night your lamplight lies on my place.

You, man and woman, live so long, it is hard
To think of you ever dying.
A little dog would get tired, living so long.
I hope that when you are lying

Under the ground like me your lives will appear
As good and joyful as mine.
No, dears, that’s too much hope: you are not so well cared for
As I have been.

And never have known the passionate undivided
Fidelities that I knew.
Your minds are perhaps too active, too many-sided….
But to me you were true.

You were never masters, but friends. I was your friend.
I loved you well, and was well loved. Deep love endures
To the end and far past the end. If this is my end,
I am not lonely. I am not afraid. I am still yours.

Frosty Died Last December
by Nicholas Gordon

Frosty died last December,
My closest friend for fifteen years.
We were born the same November;
Now I can’t put down my tears,

It’s not fair that dogs should live
Just a short piece of our lives;
They give us the love we give
To parents, children, husbands, wives.

More loyal than a human love,
More passionate and all-consuming:
No spat would Frosty’s love remove,
So fixed on me, so unassuming.

My grief is real, my pain is strong,
Though not all would be so moved;
But I can’t think how I’ll go on
Without this creature I so loved.

Jasmine
by Nicholas Gordon

Jasmine was my best, most loyal friend,
A lover to the bone, all hot affection.
Squirming out the moment I came near,
Making for my nose or inner ear,
In ecstasy she’d lick away dejection,
Nuzzling with neither strategy nor end.
Even death has made her no less dear.

To the Memory of the Same Dog
by William Wordsworth,1805

We grieved for thee, and wished thy end were past;
And willingly have laid thee here at last:
For thou hadst lived till everything that cheers
In thee had yielded to the weight of years;
Extreme old age had wasted thee away,
And left thee but a glimmering of the day;
Thy ears were deaf, and feeble were thy knees,--
I saw thee stagger in the summer breeze,
Too weak to stand against its sportive breath,
And ready for the gentlest stroke of death.
It came, and we were glad; yet tears were shed;
Both man and woman wept when thou wert dead;
Not only for a thousand thoughts that were,
Old household thoughts, in which thou hadst thy share;
But for some precious boons vouchsafed to thee,
Found scarcely anywhere in like degree!
For love, that comes wherever life and sense
Are given by God, in thee was most intense;
A chain of heart, a feeling of the mind,
A tender sympathy, which did thee bind
Not only to us Men, but to thy Kind:
Yea, for thy fellow-brutes in thee we saw
A soul of love, love’s intellectual law:--
Hence, if we wept, it was not done in shame;
Our tears from passion and from reason came,
And, therefore, shalt thou be an honoured name!

To a Cat
by Jorge Luis Borges

Mirrors are not more silent
nor the creeping dawn more secretive;
in the moonlight, you are that panther
we catch sight of from afar.
By the inexplicable workings of a divine law,
we look for you in vain;
More remote, even, that the Ganges or the setting sun,
yours is the solitude, yours the secret.
Your haunch allows the lingering
caress of my hand. You have accepted,
since that long forgotten past,
the love of the distrustful hand.
You belong to another time. You are lord
of a place bounded like a dream.

Ed Was a Black and White Paint Quarter Horse
by Nicholas Gordon

Ed was a black and white Paint Quarter Horse.
He died around the age of fifteen years.
We cannot share his inner world, of course:
Such loveliness lies far beyond our tears.
He came to us beaten and afraid,
But in about a year he chose to love,
Never questioning the choice he made,
Nor from that passion did he ever move.
It wasn’t mere acceptance or compulsion
That made him such a gentle, loving friend.
Some innocence of which we have no notion
Gave him a depth we cannot comprehend.
He loved us with a dignity and grace
We cannot hope to answer or replace.

Be Patient with Life
by Nicholas Gordon

Be patient with life, despite its cruelty.
Often it seems careless of our pain,
But just as often brings us hope again.

Remember, I wanted happiness for you.
Under every foolish word this still was true.
Be happy, then, without, as you would with me.
In your life many sweet events remain.
Not in anguish, but in joy remember me.

Do Believe I’ll Never Leave You
by Nicholas Gordon

Do believe I’ll never leave you:
Always I’ll be in your heart.
Don’t forget my soul is near you,
And so we’ll never be apart.